Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
