i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize