So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I'm in my boyfriends bathroom and I shit so bad, there was no toilet paper but his mom's clothes were on the floor and I wiped my butt on her underwear... now it looks like she sharted
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize
