Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
