Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
