Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.

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(302): View more from Delaware

It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.

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(801): View more from Utah

we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(815): View more from Illinois

I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.

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(404): View more from Georgia

haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me

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(609): View more from New Jersey

im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...

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(727): View more from Florida

I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.

(1-727): View more from Florida

Please never have kids.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"

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