the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps