Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.