you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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