he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
