I wish I could teleport
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Randomize
