It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
I was going to clean my house but wine sounded better
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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