my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
