Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Randomize
