You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
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The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
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