as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
How external is "for external use only"?
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Randomize
