I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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