Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
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The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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