I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
