We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Just cropdusted the office
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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