did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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