What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Randomize
