I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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