Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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