Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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