..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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