I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
we're chasing vodka with high fives
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
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