He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
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