Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
Randomize
