last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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