How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
