I wannas sexs uuuuu
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
