I can't breathe out the right side of my face
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
