I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
