i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
