none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize