Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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