My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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