When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
