my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
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