I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Is Oprah even human
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
