so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Randomize
