Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
