So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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