the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
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I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
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I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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