Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I'm passing your future prison.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
