In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Randomize