Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
