i'm signing you up for texting rehab
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
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