I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Randomize
