I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
