ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
zippers are such a cool invention
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Randomize
