Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize